Do we want children?
While there are some areas where people feel comfortable compromising on—say, choosing a house a few miles out of a preferred neighborhood—the decision to have kids is not a gray area for most. That’s why Dr. Yvonne Thomas, Ph.D., says it’s essential to select a life partner who shares your same family-planning goals and childcare perspective. “It can be quite a shock and can sometimes cause a breakup to discover after you are married that you and your significant other are not on the same page about this topic,” she warns. “It is imperative that you and your partner have this talk and be transparent and honest with each other about the subject of children.”
Do we want to follow a religion? If so, which one?
Some people build their lives around religion, while for others it’s not as big of a focus. Regardless of whether you choose to follow the same beliefs, understanding where you both stand will ensure a happy marriage, according to Dr. Thomas. Misalignment could be a deal-breaker for some people, but not everyone.
“You both would need to see if you and your partner could agree on this or could blend or co-exist with each other’s religions or lack of religion if there is a difference between the two of you. If there is a significant clash or discomfort for either or both of you, the issue of religion may be something you two cannot compromise on and could be too insurmountable for you and your partner to resolve,” she adds.
Yvonne Thomas, Ph.D. is a marriage therapist in Los Angeles. To read the full article “The 7 Most Important Questions To Ask Before Marriage” visit weddingwire.com